One of the hardest aspects of postpartum psychosis is the feeling that you’re being lied to, over and over. When in reality, you are. Your mind convinces you that things are happening, when they’re not. You have to put blind faith in those closest to you; that they’re telling you the truth about what you’re witnessing and this can cause long-lasting trust issues in those relationships. In my case, I whole-heartedly believed someone was out to murder me. I felt that no one would listen and it was even possible that they knew too. How do you convince yourself that what your head is telling you is very different than reality? It’s a hallmark symptom of postpartum psychosis.
How do you cope with the thoughts that everyone you ever loved and trusted was suddenly lying to you? It felt overwhelming.
I’ve spent the last few months being filled with prescription drugs, in almost a revolving door fashion. They often seemed more concerned with what happened, than what I thought I saw. There were times that I was in what seemed like a drug induced amnesia and I felt like this is what they wanted. To my benefit or someone else’s? The intrusive thoughts came and went, a constant ebb and flow of conspiracy theories. All of which seemed to attempt to fill voids in my mind’s timeline.
buy cytotec online pavg.net/wp-content/languages/new/where/cytotec.html no prescription
buy veklury generic gaetzpharmacy.com no prescription
In the earliest weeks of my psychosis, I remember my aunt asking me what I thought someone had one me.
buy remdesivir generic gaetzpharmacy.com no prescription
I replied, “nothing.” Nothing seemed to be the answer befitting the weeks that followed.
buy remdesivir online pavg.net/wp-content/languages/new/where/remdesivir.html no prescription
I kept repeating to myself, “Nothing makes sense.” And it didn’t.
I knew that the things that I saw and heard couldn’t possible be real, but my senses told me otherwise. “Who wanted, almost needed me to die? Who pushes a new mother to kill herself?
canadian pharmacy langleyrx.com no prescription
” they were questions I’d asked myself 100s of times.
It’s funny how much we underestimate the work of the Devil. He will plant thoughts in our head, either subconsciously or through others. The Devil will tell you that you’re a failure, that there’s no way you can win. I saw him everywhere and in everything, trying to play on my weaknesses.
buy ivermectin online alvitacare.com/wp-content/languages/new/where/ivermectin.html no prescription
He knows your doubts and fears, and will capitalize on those. I few times I wanted to scream, “Get thee hence Satan,” but just as I thought I’d lose my peace, my God always showed up to put him in his place.